Introduction
I planned to write this on Friday, but I was in no frame of mind to do any work. I was going to do it yesterday, but RP3 and lesson planning (quite rightly) took priority. So, I’m sitting at home, writing this on Sunday and I’ve found that the week is a bit of a blur. I’ve decided not to worry too much about this – I’m just going to keep this a short post picking out the best and the worst of the week!
9Y3 – Pink for perfect
I’m pretty sure I mentioned this last week, but I’m not 100% sure so I’ll explain again. As I was marking my 9Y3 travel writing (first drafts), I decided to try something new and dedicate a part of each of my lessons this week purely to celebrating what every single one of my students has achieved. One of the other English teachers uses highlights one sentence ‘pink for perfect’ in her marking; I loved that idea, but I wanted to take it one step further.
I decided to collate together all my ‘perfect’ sentences and use them as a starter so they can pick out what makes these sentences so great. This meant that, over the whole week, the students had 25 examples of fantastic sentences in their books, combined with annotations as to what makes them so brilliant. I was very proud of my idea and couldn’t wait to see it unfold.
The reaction from my students couldn’t have been better. It was incredible to see every single student’s face light up when they saw I had actually picked one of their sentences. Following this up with a discussion about what made it good, boosted their confidence and got them thinking about the different aspects I was focusing on this week (sentence variety, vivid description and ambitious vocabulary).
I knew this was going well. My AT observed one of these lessons and showered me with praise afterwards – particularly mentioning the p4p sentences. But the one moment that I will treasure forever is this:
One of my students has not been meeting her target grade in the past couple of units, and has resulted her in feeling completely unconfident, extremely frustrated and has come close to tears in more than one of my lessons. In the lesson her sentence was used, we went through the sentences as usual and nothing was said. About halfway through the lesson, she had her hand up with the biggest grin stretching from ear to ear. “Miss, this is my sentence! I thought it was absolutely fantastic and then, as I was looking at my work, I realised it was mine!” – or words to the effect. She was so proud of herself in that moment, but she couldn’t be as proud of herself as I was of her. The realisation that she wasgood at English and that she coulddo it was such a ground breaking moment for both of us. She told me afterwards that she is determined to make her travel writing as good as she can and is even doing extra work on it over the weekend.
This is why I got into teaching. For moments like this.
Spiralling downwards
I have been doing great recently. I have been teaching well and I have felt extremely happy – like everything has just fallen into place. So why was Friday such a bad day?
Not enough progress happened in any of my three lessons that day. The students were rowdier than usual, I had to raise my voice to get their attention in all 3 lessons. But it wasn’t them. There was something about myself – I felt foggy. Like I couldn’t focus properly and therefore couldn’t teach. I was stressed beyond belief and just felt utterly exhausted – despite getting a good night’s rest. I am just slightly concerned that this will continue to happen. I’m sure it won’t – I’ll try not to let it… but I suddenly thought to myself… what if I’ve peaked? What if I am thrust in a classroom next year and suddenly find myself totally incapable – like I felt on that day.
Realistically, I know this is just my anxiety bubbling up. I am a massive hypocrite – I am always on at my friends to make sure their mental health is cared for, but I consistently never get mine checked out (normally because I can’t warrant spending any of my precious hours of the day at the doctors). I have, however, become very good at rationalising things to myself. So, this morning, I have come to the conclusion it is probably because of a mixture of the following things:
- My university tutor is coming to see me teach year 12 next week. I only took this class for the first-time last Thursday, and it was such a mediocre lesson. I don’t know the class as well as my others (I only see them twice a fortnight) and there are a few unpredictable students that can be quite challenging. I’ve spoken to the class teacher and, as they’ve got a few lessons dedicated to these texts, I have made this a slightly more fun lesson – including Bingo with prizes (yes I reward my students with edible treats every now and again – don’t judge me) so, hopefully, they will be on the ball on Tuesday!
- I’ve started applying for a job. A job that I want more than anything. It is at my first placement school and I loved it so much there… it’s almost as if there is a mountain of pressure on this application and interview. My university tutor has very kindly accepted my plea of looking over the application for me… but I just have this gut feeling – if they turn around and say they don’t want me then what chance do I have anywhere else?
- There are other non-university factors that have definitely been affecting my mood – I won’t go into them as they’re fairly personal and about other people.
I’m hoping this is just a blip and I am praying that next week goes better!
J
Currently Reading:
Bleak House –Charles Dickens
Dreaming the Bear – Mimi Thebo
The Red Queen – Victoria Aveyard
Animal Farm– George Orwell
1 week left on placement and only 3 chapters left to read! I’m hoping we’ll finish the book before I go, would love to see what my students think of the novel as a whole!
Much Ado About Teaching 